1. Introduction… Here’s my story.
Hey You, Yes you.😇
Have you ever been in that phase where everything was worth a try?… Drugs, alcohol, uncontrollable sex, unimaginable freedom, and so much more. By ‘that phase’ I mean campus. As a shy weirdo, That’s who I think I am.I qualified for university and joined the ‘least liked of them all‘ -Moi. You get that feeling, you’re super thrilled to go to campus but.. a small part of you is scared. Well, I had a different feeling towards it. I was more scared than excited. I was more worried about, how people will perceive me, how I’ll fit in, how everything will work out…
Buuut, hold on, this was no story of how I joined campus but rather how the going is in Uni.
2. Alcohol, does it help or not?
I started drinking after high school, you know, like a reasonable amount. There’s this party where I almost stripped and had this feeling of wanting to go skinny dipping in a dam.
Ok, Enough of my drunk stories, this is not a story about intoxication or it could be I don’t know… In a sense My campus life is all: books, movies and alcohol in that particular order. I didn’t think I’d be involved with alcohol as much as I am now. I don’t even know if am making any sense but oh well.. See, the thing about alcohol, it’s not that it ruins lives, technically, its supposed to help people, but in my case I can’t tell if it helps or not.
I feel the most lonely when I am drunk, I can’t help it. This happens all the time irregardless of when am getting drunk with someone. I’ll still get lonely even its a really nice and cute guy who’s getting drunk with me and opening up to me, cause you know.. that’ll be the only moment you’ll talk to someone and when he leaves. You have to get back to your room, your wall and your pillow… There’s moment’s when I’ll have a really good time with friends and dance and make funny videos… because that’s a really good way of dealing with depression and loneliness. But, when I rewatch the videos, I realize am staring at the old me, the one who judges herself in every way possible, because she’s just not ready for this world, she still can’t face it, literally.
4. She can’t handle mirrors…
She doubts herself all the time. She can’t handle mirrors cause all they do is scream reality to her face. She was the happiest when masks were introduced ,she would finally get to cover herself and let no one see her..
5. Have You ever?
How the hell did I get here. You ever imagine yourself in some foreign land, but when you get there, you are worshipped, people look up to you, come to you when they need anything, you are like their ‘god’ but despite the different abilities you posses. You have a shitty weakness. You are scared of yourself. You can’t face a mirror, no this will destroy you. If you have, then this is the situation that I face, not that I’m a god or anything, but you do get what I mean right? For some reason, this has been the stupidest shit I’ve ever written but also its the realest I’ve ever been..
*This article, Has been published Anonymously as requested by it’s author, where due minor changes have been made by the editor to ensure congruence of thoughts*